We aren’t complacent people. We don’t put our feet up. We don’t sit still. Whatever the game is, we like to win. And once we win, we get a new game. We push ourselves. It doesn’t matter how much we achieve. If you’re a climber there’s always another mountain.They take pictures of mountain climbers at the top of a mountain. They’re smiling, ecstatic, triumphant. They don’t take pictures along the way cos who wants to remember the rest of it. We push ourselves because we have to, not because we like it. The relentless climb, the pain and anguish of taking it to the next level. Nobody takes pictures of that. Nobody wants to remember. We just wanna remember the view from the top. The breathtaking moment at the edge of the world. That’s what keeps us climbing. And it’s worth the pain. That’s the crazy part. It’s worth everything -G.A
“Have patience with everything that remains unsolved in your heart. Try to love the questions themselves, like locked rooms and like books written in a foreign language. Do not now look for the answers. They cannot now be given to you because you could not live them. It is a question of experiencing everything. At present you need to live the question. Perhaps you will gradually, without even noticing it, find yourself experiencing the answer, some distant day.”—-Letters to a Young Poet (Rainer Maria Rilke)
People have scars. In all sorts of unexpected places. Like secret road maps of their personal histories. Diagrams of all their old wounds. Most of our wounds heal, leaving nothing behind but a scar. But some of them don’t. Some wounds we carry with us everywhere and though the cut’s long gone, the pain still lingers. What’s worse, new wounds which are so horribly painful or old wounds that should’ve healed years ago and never did? Maybe our old wounds teach us something. They remind us where we’ve been and what we’ve overcome. They teach us lessons about what to avoid in the future. That’s what we like to think. But that’s not the way it is, is it? Some things we just have to learn over and over and over again.
Pain, it comes in all forms. A small impulse, a bit of soreness, the random pain, the normal pains that we live with everyday. Then there’s the kind of pain you can’t ignore. A level of pain so great that it blocks out everything else; makes the rest of your world fade away until all we can think about is how much we hurt. How we manage our pain is up to us. Pain. We anesthetize, ride it out, embrace it, ignore it… and for some of us, the best way to manage pain is to just push through it. You just have to ride it out, hope it goes away on its own, hope the wound that caused it heals. There are no solutions, no easy answers. You just breathe deep and wait for it to subside. Most of the time pain can be managed, but sometimes the pain gets you when you least expect it, hits way below the belt and doesn’t let up. Pain, you just have to fight through, because the truth is you can’t outrun it, and life always makes more.
The ties that binds us are sometimes impossible to explain. They connect us even after it seems like the ties should be broken. Some bonds defy distance and time and logic; Because some ties are simply meant to be.
Bones break. Organs burst. Flesh tears. But whatever physical trauma we endure, we often manage to recover from it. We can sew the flesh, repair the damage, ease the pain. But when life breaks down…when we break down…there’s no science. No hard and fast rules. We just have to feel our way through. And for some, there’s nothing worse but nothing better. And sometimes, most of the time, that’s all we can do. To feel our way through and hope that we recover in time before life throws another curve ball.
At the end of the day, when it comes down to it, all we really want is to be close to somebody. So this thing where we all keep our distance and pretend not to care about each other, it’s usually a load of bull. So we pick and choose who we want to remain close to, and once we’ve chosen those people, we tend to stick close by. No matter how much we hurt them. The people that are still with you at the end of the day, those are the ones worth keeping. And sure, sometimes close can be too close. But sometimes, that invasion of personal space, it can be exactly what you need. We enter the world alone and we leave it alone. And everything that happens in between, we owe it to our self to find a little company. We need help. We need support. Otherwise we’re in it by our self. Strangers, cut off from each other and we forget just how connected we all are. So instead we choose love. We choose life and for a moment we feel just a little bit less alone.
Time takes pleasure in kicking our asses. For even the strongest of us it seems to play tricks. Slowing down… hovering… until it freezes. Leaving us stuck in a moment — unable to move in one direction or the other. But then again time flies. Time waits for no man. Time heals all wounds. All any of us wants is more time. Time to stand up. Time to grow up. Time to let go. Time.
Communication. It’s the first thing we really learn in life. Funny thing is, once we grow up, learn our words and really start talking the harder it becomes to know what to say. Or how to ask for what we really need. At the end of the day, there are some things you just can’t help but talk about. Some things we just don’t want to hear, and some things we say because we can’t be silent any longer. Some things are more than what you say, they’re what you do. Some things you say because there’s no other choice. Some things you keep to yourself. And not too often, but every now and then, some things simply speak for themselves.How do you know when how much is too much? Too much too soon. Too much information. Too much fun. Too much love. Too much to ask… And when is it all just too much to bear?
Don´t wonder why people go crazy. Wonder why we don´t…. What is it that keeps our fingering from pulling that trigger? In the face of what we can lose in a day, in a sudden instant, wonder what the hell it is that makes us hold it together. Trauma is everywhere around us. It follows us home and changes the game completely around. It messes everybody up, but maybe that’s the point. All the pain and the fear and the crap we face in an instant, maybe going through all of that is what keeps us moving forward. It’s what pushes us to become better and stronger. Maybe we have to get a little messed up, before we can step up….But really, what is it that drives people to the extreme? Is it due to the surrender of the heart or is it a surrender to ourselves?