“And once the storm is over you won’t remember how you made it through, how you managed to survive. You won’t even be sure, in fact, whether the storm is really over. But one thing is certain. When you come out of the storm you won’t be the same person who walked in.”—Haruki Murakami (via middlenameconfused)
"My main goal is to stay alive. To keep fooling myself into hanging around. To keep getting up every day. Right now I live without inspiration. I go day to day and do the work because it’s all I know. I know that if I keep moving I stand a chance. I must keep myself going until I find a reason to live. I need one so bad. On the other hand maybe I don’t. Maybe it’s all bullshit. Nothing I knew from my old life can help me here. Most of the things that I believed turned out to be useless. Appendages from someone else’s life.
Everything I have I would give to not know what I know. To not feel emptiness as my constant companion. To not look into this room and be reminded why I’m in it. I’m not getting enough air. The room feels so small all of a sudden. It’s pathetic to be this lonely and know it. To keep breathing. To be silent and alone. And to know.”
“Sometimes I would get invited to a party or get asked to go out to dinner but I decline. Part of me wanted to go, but those kind of outings always made me feel even more alienated than usual. Hearing them talk made me feel lonely and hateful at the same time. Lonely because I didn’t fit in, never did. When I was reminded, it hurt. And hateful because it reaffirmed what I already knew, that I was alone and on the outside.”— Henry Rollins (The Portable Henry Rollins)
“Its no surprise to me that anyone hardly tells the truth about how they feel. The smart ones keep to themselves for good reason. Why would you want to tell anyone anything that’s dear to you?
Even when you like them and want nothing more than to be closer to them? It’s so painful to be next to someone you feel so strongly about and know you can’t say the things you want to.”— Henry Rollins
“I love that feeling. You know, the one you get when you take a deep breath and suddenly everything feels like it’s going to be okay. When you’re hopeless as can be, and life is going nowhere, there’s those moments we have every now and then where we just stop, and we get this feeling, that can’t be described, but you just.. you just feel like everything really is going to be okay. Like the world stopped spinning for a second, and everything was clear. I need more of those moments.”—anon (via middlenameconfused)
“There is never a sudden revelation, a complete and tidy explanation for why it happened, or why it ends, or why or who you are. You want one and I want one, but there isn’t one. It comes in bits and pieces, and you stitch them together wherever they fit, and when you are done you hold yourself up, and still there are holes and you are a rag doll, invented, imperfect. And yet you are all that you have, so you must be enough. There is no other way.”—Marya Hornbacher (via middlenameconfused)
“We all stray at least once in our lives but sometimes we never find our way back. Aimless souls with no particular dreams. Smirks not smiles, chuckles not laughs. Wandering in the dark not even curious as to who turned off the light anymore. Laying under sun rays creeping through the blinds. Lifeless. Apathetic. Indifferent. The world is so serious, but why are we so amused?”—
“We all start out so damn sure, thinking we’ve got the world on a string. If we ever stopped to think about the infinite number of ways we could be undone, we’d never leave our bedrooms.”— Jonathan Tropper (This Is Where I Leave You)
“You have to look at what you have right in front of you, at what it could be, and stop measuring it against what you’ve lost. I know this to be wise and true, just as I know that pretty much no one can do it.”—Jonathan Tropper (via middlenameconfused)
“You can forget that other people carry pieces of your own story around in their heads. I’ve always thought—put together all those random pieces form everyone who’s ever known you from your parents to the guy who once sat next to you on a bus, and you’d probably see a fuller version of your life than you even did while living it.”—Deb Caletti
“Take it from me: If you hear the past speaking to you, feel it tugging up your back and runing its fingers up your spine, the best thing to do-the only thing-is run.”—Lauren Oliver, Delirium (via creatingaquietmind)